Thursday, October 23, 2008

Rocket Man

If rumour's mill is even close to being correct, Hiz'B'Allah's creepy body part Collector General H'Ssan Nasrallah's royal taster is probably either dead, in exile or wishes he was.

Unverified reports indicate the fiery rocket rich rejectionist was magically poisoned last week and only the timely intervention of Iranian medical doctors saved his life.

Or did they?

A few days back Persian paper Khoursid leaked the leak that Hiz'B'Allah chief of the party's executive council, Hachem Safieddine, was handpicked as HBA's designated successor, since Little Satan is suspected of wanting to rip the living guts out of H'Ssan - and most likely - any designated successors too.

Also, Pyramidland disses any notion of commotion like issuing invites to Nasrallah to hang in Cairo for a regional summit of sorts.

HBA online says absolutely nothing about this and other sources deny that the General Secretary is or was in any danger - though no one who has seen the little guy recently is available for comment.

Hiz'B'Allah's 2nd in command - the original supervillan - Imad Muganiyeh was incinerated in a mystery blast in a controlled area of Damascus back on St Valentine's Day (sweet!).

While everybody in the ME blames Little Satan for literally blowing Imad straight into the perfumed gardens of paradise, Little Satan has always denied involvement.

If a poisoning attempt really was made and failed - or even better - succeeded, it is true that Little Satan has a penchant for poisoning her enemies - like the failed attempt on HAMAS's death cult fanboy Khalid Meshal in Jordan a while back.

Or the adios amigo that may have afflicted Comrade 'Papa' Arafat.

Since HBA was the most proficient killers and serial tormentors of Americans til 911 time, there is a blood debt that has no statue of limitations that Great Satan may be collecting directly or through her soulmates in the MOSSAD.

In that spirit, if H'Ssan is alive - Great Satan fans worldwide should fervently wish his recovery is slow, agonizing and fully booked with a shrieking, painful, very short lifespan. Or least recovery is halted right about the mentis non compos stage.

Iranian pol Larijani (the same cat who made the French guy cry when he was sacked for being somewhat negotiable with the EU about designer enriched wmd suspected suspicions) is enroute to visit H'Ssan and is rumoured to be carry 'messages' from Iraqi preacher Al Sistani.

Art - "Rocket Rich Retard"


Findalis said...

This is what happens when you don't have a food taster. Poor guy. His food is being poisoned. Or is it that his wives are poisoning him.

Either way he should welcome death in this way. He would be proclaimed a martyr and given his 72 virgins.

Skunkfeathers said...

Let's recruit the Iranian leadership some more "tasters" ;)

Anonymous said...

Keep it up, Courtney!