Friday, April 13, 2012


"This We"ll Defend"

Of all of history's armies - state and non state - Great Satan"s voltiguers are in a class all by themselves.

Barely a century ago, a collective of saber rattling cavalry cats fully crunk for Indian fighting on the Great Plains sweetly xformed into a conscript army of 2 million modern infantry and gate crashed the horrific stalemate of Western Front. 

Huge offensives against German lines with 300k Americans hitting the hood every month collapsed the Teutonic War Machine and made the naughty Imperial Deutschers scream "God! Please! Stop!"

A brief interlude followed as Great Satan was once again sucked into war against her own will - another massive build up, surpassing unbeatable ubermensch and another victory in the combined arms spirit of her Total War Master General Sherman.

Fast forward half a century plus later and the Iraq War saw the meme that Great Satan"s army was broken, fubar - unable to really do anything to force an issue anywhere.

The infamous Abu Muqawama (the good Abu - not to be confused with the evil Abu Moqawama) follows up with his bit 'bout while the Wild Blue Yonder and Global Force for Good cats are all hot for new missions in the new millennium - Great Satan"s Army guys are "...still pining for the days..." when the ancient Soviet Union and her panzerlicious Shock Armies, were totally hot to blitz thru Fulda Gap alla way to the coast of Spain in 7 days. (Always took me like 11 days

Anywrought -
If the Army is unmoored strategically, however, there is good news to report with respect to the way in which it has survived a decade of war in Iraq and Afghanistan. Americans, U.S. allies and U.S. adversaries should all take note.
In the aftermath of the Vietnam conflict, of course, the U.S. Army was a shadow of its former self. Drug abuse was widespread within the ranks, and discipline was low among the conscripted soldiers who made up the force. An external evaluation cited by James Kitfield in his book “Prodigal Soldiers” at the time warned Army leaders that the Army was “close to losing its pride, heart and soul and therefore its [combat effectiveness].” 
This past week, by contrast, the U.S. Army released the results of an internal survey it conducted on the health of the force (.pdf), and the findings are encouraging. 
The all-volunteer force, which was never intended to fight a decade of continuous conflict, has nonetheless succeeded beyond all expectations in Iraq and Afghanistan in terms of maintaining its health and professionalism.  
 True dat! As prophesied -
Compared to any nation in history, Great Satan has a more democratized military that views individuals as capable and competent, and empowers them with unprecedented levels of autonomy and decision making at every rank.
 Xformation looks like there will be 3 major types of ground combat brigades:
  • Heavy brigades will have around 3,700 troops and be equivalent to a mech inf or panzer brigade.
  • Stryker brigades will have around 3,900 troops and be based on the Stryker family of vehicles.
  • Inf brigades will have around 3,300 troops and be equivalent to a light infantry or airborne brigade.
Also check the massive 'hello' to anti COIN Ganksta Col G 
There is still cause for concern, though. Among them is the common complaint that, due to the focus on the counterinsurgency fight in Afghanistan, combat units are losing some of their traditional core skills.
To be fair, Colonel G may riposte with a told ya so with a blistering blitz und counter attack of sorts...just saying (:
Overall, Great Satan can take pride in her professional army, and her allies around the world can be similarly encouraged by the robust health of an institution serving in more than 100 countries worldwide.
American people should be asking other questions about the costs of having asked so few to bear such a heavy burden for so long. For example, will the way in which the Army has weathered a decade of war make policymakers more likely to deploy ground forces to combat elsewhere? Do the American people have a moral responsibility to share the costs of wars in which a relatively tiny percentage of the public has served?
And the answers to those questions will affect the way in which Great Satan engages with the world as  involvement in the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan draws to a close.
Whoa! Direct Hit!! Fire For Effect!

And to be about as subtle as wearing a thong to church is as ancient as organized conflict itself  
 "To conquer and destroy the armed power of the enemy; To take possession of his material and other sources of strength, and To gain public opinion."

Pic - "Only pursuit of the beaten enemy gives the fruits of victory." 


Unknown said...

"Great Satan's Girlfriend" has been included in this weeks Sites To See. I hope this helps to attract many visitors here.

Aaron Burr said...

You an actual Field Rep for the Great Satan, I'd just like to thank you fine young ladies it is you do. I mean it's great. Sure, I have to crack open some alka seltzer whenever I try to translate a post into English, but what the heck, it's always worth it.

In fact, I'm thinking about sending you lovely ladies some swag. We've got all kinds of highly collectable crap, from "Shittles" t shirts all the way to our new "I squeal for allah" bacon grease votive candles. (We added shredded up bits of the koran to the bacon grease for that fatwa worthy smell.)

Anyway, just thought I'd say howdy and thank you again for all your hard work.

Aaron Burr
V.P. Research & Destruction

GrEaT sAtAn'S gIrLfRiEnD said...

@Mr. Beuterbaugh - thanks for the shout out sir

GrEaT sAtAn'S gIrLfRiEnD said...

@V.P. Burr - oh, we likes the swag! Thanks for the kind words - we are aiming to make it way more understandably for ebberdobby. Thanks for your service to GrEaT sAtAn

Aaron Burr said...

Hmmm. After reviewing the product line it turns out that all I have for women specifically are sheer cami tops and sexy lil' thong underwear.

I hadn't realized I was such a delightful misogynist.

Tell ya what, shoot me a shirt size and I'll slap the E.C. logo on a pink polo. Skirts dig pink.

Unless you need an apron and/or oven mitts.