Sunday, March 21, 2010

Speaking In Tongues

Not so long ago, Great Satan's Surgin' General - P4 - trekked through CENTCOM's south 40 and expertly spoke the lingo of the risible Arabic he man medieval shame and honor cult (which inexplicably, shame and honor is often found betwixt the legs of girls).

As Arab leaders cried out that Persian influ in Arabic Iraq was off the hook - P4 did his best Yoda Jedi Master impersonation:

“I would remind my Arab brothers if there is concern about certain influences in Iraq then it would be wise to increase the Arab influence.”

In the wild wack ME - where no means maybe and maybe means no - speaking in tongues may be essential.

If, it is indeed true that Great Satan's lack of control over her out of control ho Little Satan is queering the mix on the 'Forever Quest' for Mid East Peace, disheartening fence sitting corrupt royalty in Ray Bans and driving billions of formerly normal cats into raging caliphaters, terrorists or future control freaks that might maybe sort of result in the destruction of CENTCOM and all her precious assets, then perhaps the current calculus is all wrong.

Instead of freaking out, trying to distance Great Satan from a sister 'democrazy' or becoming the two Palestines patron attorneys or getting all goofy to appear all 'even handed' in regards to forcing a still born 23rd and 24th member of Arab League as the world's 58th and 59th M'hammedist Nation States, perhaps Great Satan's diplopolititary machine could take a language lesson from P4

Something like

"Why cry because you have no boots if you have no feet?"


"If our Arab brothers are concerned about the struggle for Palestine, perhaps they could officially recognize Little Satan and engage in honest, active brokering - instead of sulking, weeping and playing possum


"Alas! It's true - Little Satan has total control over Great Satan, thus to avoid a Greater Little Satan stretching from the Nile to the Euphrates (bankrolled and blessed with the hottest weaponry in the world provided at wholesale prices) perhaps concerned nations should strive to develop profitable, peaceful relations with Little Satan, tone down the rhetoric and pressure corrupt Palestinian leaders to cease acting out as a charitable black hole and get with it"

Pic - "Ashlee!"